BE YOUR BEST SELF

BE YOUR BEST SELF: Aligning Who You Are With the Best You Can Be

A Moment of Reflection and Renewal

Since this is only the second blog of 2024, it probably goes without saying there has been a shift in my focus or priorities. Whether by choice or circumstance, I’m not entirely sure. But one thing remains clear: God has been consistent in reminding me of the importance of balancing rest with the pursuit of becoming my best.

The Journey

If you follow my platform, you’re familiar with my reference to “the good, the bad, the ugly, and the unexpected.” Through life’s journey, we’ll experience each of these at some point. They come with the territory. But along the path, there will be opportunities for reflection and renewal so that we can come into alignment with the truth of who we are and the dreams of who we hope to become and have been purposed to be. This need is consistent for a healthy mindset, and part of what I’d like to discuss in this blog. 

What I’ve seen from the road trips I’ve taken is that the scenery changes along the way, and as we get closer to our destination our anxiousness increases out of anticipation of what is ahead. But as we become seasoned drivers, the ride seems to get better and more tolerable as we proceed. However, we’re usually never satisfied until either we make it where we’re going, or look back on where we’ve been. 

Life, in my opinion, is like a long road trip. We all have a destination, but we can’t drive straight through. There will have to be fuel-ups (or in today’s era, charge-ups), rest stops, and sometimes extended stays here and there. But no matter how tired we feel, eventually, we’ll have to get back on the road and continue the journey. And, just like the occasional dread felt when preparing for a long drive, the same is often true when facing something in life that is either uncertain or requires more time than we’d actually like to commit to the process. 

Good, Better, Best

The year was 1991 when I heard “Good, Better, Best.” Although many years have passed, this 50-year-old still stands firm on those words today, and I share them often with others. So, let me explain. 

When I was a junior in high school, I distinctly remember where I was sitting in the gymnasium when a motivational speaker shared this quote with the student body:

“Good, better, best…never let it rest…until your good is better and your better is best.” ~Saint Jerome (4th & 5th Century Scholar)

Immediately, those words sent something through me. 

The Journey to Self-Alignment and Personal Responsibility

Though I faired well academically and would have been considered one of the popular students, 11th grade came with some challenges. Those challenges were mostly emotional and relational and really had nothing to do with school, but they were challenges nonetheless. 

I remember that season being one where I was seriously considering what my future held and how or whether the current events of my life would factor into what was to come. I had some truths and dreams, and I would later understand that their alignment would determine what lay ahead for this country girl.

Those words…“Good, better, best…never let it rest…until your good is better and your better is best” resonated deeply with more than just what was directly in front of me. Most importantly, something about those words helped me to realize that I would have to take responsibility for my journey regardless of what those around me did or didn’t do. 

Two Truths and a Dream 

Recently, I was invited to speak at a girls’ summer program founded by Cher Best – a local radio personality in Augusta, GA. The renowned program is endearingly named Camp Be Your Best, and I was asked to present to a group of teenagers about “Being Their B.E.S.T. Self”. Talk about a play on words. Here was the perfect opportunity for me to share the “Good, Better, Best” analogy. 

As a part of my presentation, I had the young ladies share TWO TRUTH AND A DREAM —- two truths about themselves and one dream they had for the future. The reason behind this exercise was to help the young ladies understand a component of defining themselves and embodying their self-confidence. 

Let’s unpack the nuance of those: SELF and SELF-CONFIDENCE

• Self: The entirety of an individual’s identity, including their thoughts, feelings, and actions. It’s who someone is as a person – preferences, personality, and experiences.

• Self-Confidence: Trust in one’s abilities, qualities, and judgment. It’s the belief that we can achieve goals and handle situations effectively. 

I explained to the young ladies that for someone to be their best self, they must first both know the truth of who they are and have confidence in something to dream towards. If the truths of who we are don’t align with our dreams, intentional effort must be made to foster change. Notice I didn’t say the dream couldn’t come true. It absolutely can. There just needs to be proper evidence and alignment to bring it forth. However, staying in a posture of self-confidence can be difficult. As a support, timely check-ins with others can help.

The Power of Relationships & Check-ins

Recently, a friend reached out to me with this:

Friend: Girl, where are you? You put yourself on mute?

Me: Hey! A little bit. Trying to pull myself out of the trenches. Just been tired.

Friend: Ok! Praying your strength! I GUEEESS you deserved a break! Go back in HEART first! Love ya! Now don’t let the devil block you from being GREAT! Rejuvenate and get back on your POST! You inspire, you encourage, and you are doing the work you are called to do! 

Me: Amen. I receive and appreciate that.  

This simple exchange was a reminder to me of the importance of staying connected to my truth and purpose, even when life feels overwhelming or uncertain. This check-in was more than just a conversation; it was a realignment of my focus. It was a nudge for me to “keep the main thing…the MAIN THING,” and not become discouraged and distracted by other life circumstances that sometimes seem to take precedence.” My main thing? Serving and inspiring others. But keeping that focus isn’t always easy. 

Taking Charge of the Best Path Forward

Let’s explore how as individuals we can build and maintain our self-confidence, discover and embody our purposes, and become the best versions of ourselves. Today, I invite you, just as I did those young ladies, to reflect on two truths of your life and your dream for your future. What do they confirm about you? Do they align? Are you on track for all that could await, or is there some effort that needs to be made to get there? Not only so you can accomplish what you hope for, but so you might be satisfied with the results. If you’re unsure, let’s delve into four key principles (each grounded in scripture) to better help you get to your B.E.S.T. self.

4 Key Principles to Being Your BEST Self 

1. B – Believe

Belief is the foundation of all achievement. If we are to achieve anything, we must have the self-confidence to know that we are capable and worthy of having what we desire. Our self-confidence is like the fuel that drives our journey towards excellence. It’s the belief that “I can do this,” even when faced with challenges. But above all, and especially during those times when belief in ourselves is waning, we should believe in the One who alone knows the plan for our life – God.  

When we believe and are aligned with God’s will, we can expect His BEST. However, don’t misunderstand God’s best for you with the best you desire for yourself or the timing you’ve forecasted.

Consider the journey of World Champion and Olympic Gold Medalist She’Carri Richardson. A few years ago her personal challenges led her to make some decisions she later regretted. These decisions kept her from a dream for which she was well suited. However, during her time of obscurity, She’Carri realigned her focus. She proved that she was capable of achieving her dream. Despite the truth of her setback, She’Carri believed she was capable and worthy of achieving greatness.

“And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek him.” ~Hebrews 11:6

Belief isn’t merely hoping something will happen, it’s a deep conviction that empowers us to take action.  To be our best, we must believe in ourselves and have unwavering faith in God’s plan, even if the plan we hoped for seems to be failing. Remember, there is no failure in God. 

2. E – Embrace Effort and Excellence

Listen, you can have hopes of reaching the highest heights in your life, career, business, or ministry; but, if the truths you know about yourself are not conducive to those goals, they’ll be hard to achieve. Embracing effort to be your best simply means being willing to put in the work.

For instance, someone could dream of receiving a job promotion and wonder why they were overlooked. However, their truth could be they don’t have the training or qualifications necessary for the position or may have unsatisfactory work ethics. Their truth and their dream don’t align; therefore, some change and effort will have to take place for them to see the results they hope for. 

James 2:17  says,

“Faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.”

Hard work and striving for excellence should be applied in all areas of life – goals, spirituality, lifestyle, and behavior. For some, our natural abilities may seem to give us an advantage in some spaces. Please, however, don’t mistake talent for effort. Relying on talent alone could cause you to be blind-sided or replaced by those putting in focused and deliberate effort. Remember, intentionality and consistency are key to excellence. If you find these difficult, begin dedicating your efforts to Christ. As you draw closer to Him, He’ll strengthen you in areas where you lack discipline. Pray to put forth consistent effort, strive for excellence to honor God, and reflect your commitment to His will.

3.  S – Seek Your Passion and God’s Purpose

Ephesians 2:8-10 –

8 For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, 9 not of works, lest anyone should boast. 10 For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.

First things first, do you know your passion and purpose? This question often arises; but honestly, I’ve encountered more people who don’t know or understand their passion or purpose than those who do. If that’s you, it’s nothing to feel ashamed of, but it is something I hope to help you explore. Whatever you do, don’t try to hijack the passions, dreams, or purposes that you see in others. Yes, they may have noteworthy gifts and talents, and may appear to contribute to society or their field in admirable ways; but you don’t actually know if that person is walking in their true purpose, nor if they are happy. 

Don’t Mistake Productivity for Passion

Please don’t misunderstand productivity in a realm as what you’ve been called to do. You may be talented in several areas, but not all of them are your passion or purpose. 

Quick example: I write, cook, and I am uniquely crafty. I also play the piano. Most would say I do well in each of the areas mentioned. But here’s the truth… I love to write (it centers me), cook (it’s my love language), and craft (it’s my way of bringing new beginnings into old spaces). However, I hate playing the piano. Was I able to fulfill a need in my churches and also make some money along the way? Absolutely. But if “get someone else to do it” was a person, her name would be Dawn and she’d be walking away from the piano. I don’t like playing the piano, but I do love music. Understand, two things can be true.

If you are a person who excels at something but feels it may not be your purpose, be careful that people (including friends, family members, and leaders) don’t allow you to fulfill a need they have of you while stifling or hindering you from fulfilling your own dreams. In full transparency, there were times when I was playing the piano FOR MONEY that I was completely unhappy and underwhelmed. I also knew that I was outside of the will of God and possibly hindering the elevation or opportunity for someone else. When it comes to purpose, be concerned about God’s playbook for your life and not the yearbook of your accomplishments.

What are some ways you can tap into your passion and purpose?

Answer these questions:

• What do you enjoy doing in your free time?
• What activity makes you lose track of time?
• What is something you do that turns a bad day into a good one?
• What is the thing you do for others or for a system that brings you consistent joy and fulfillment even when challenging? 

Chances are, one of these answers is your passion. If you answered more than one of these with the same response, whatever it is probably aligns with your purpose. If you weren’t able to answer the questions fully at this time, begin to record your activities and behaviors for the next two weeks and see what consistencies are there. Try not to force experiences or feelings. Your passion and purpose will reveal themselves in time. When they do, you’ll know it.

Today, I encourage you, if you are not exercising your gift as you should…or maybe you’re not even sure what your gift is… Ask God to not only reveal it but also to help you cultivate, build, and give you opportunities to operate in it. Remember, your passions are God’s gift to you; nurturing them is your gift to Him. Seek out what you love, and pursue it with all your heart. You’ll find that God has a purpose perfectly aligned for you.

4.  T – Take Accountability and Trust the Process

Much like getting to our best requires us to put in the work, taking accountability for the part we have played (or may have failed to play) is equally important. Though there may have been some individuals along the way who snubbed us or hindered our progress, whether unintentionally or deliberately, it’s our job to pick up those pieces and take control for ourselves. With life comes lessons, not losses. 

Know that there are no parts of life or circumstances that have caught God by surprise. He knows exactly where you are and your current condition. In fact, you’re exactly where He needs you to be. It’s all preparation. Everything that has happened up until this point contributes to pieces woven into the fabric of who you are and who you will become. Whatever negative experiences you’ve had, disconnect from their pain and hold on to their purpose. 

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path.” ~Proverbs 3:5-6

Trusting God’s process means having faith in His plan for our life, even when it doesn’t align with our immediate expectations. We must remember that His plan is perfect, even when we can’t see the whole picture; knowing that the BEST is yet to come.

Be Encouraged and Take the Best Action

In this next season, I challenge you to live in your truth and continue to dream for the greatness intended for you. Keep in mind that life’s journey is not just about achieving our goals but of becoming the best versions of ourselves. Like She’Carri Richardson’s journey to becoming a champion, we will encounter obstacles and detours on our paths, but we can navigate them with grace, determination, and purpose. Have the audacity to be your B.E.S.T.:

• Believe in Yourself: Have unwavering faith knowing that you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you. 
• Embrace Effort: Put in the work required to reach your goals and strive for excellence in all you do.
• Seek Your Passion and God’s Purpose: Find and nurture what you love and ask God to build the evidence of it.
• Take Accountability and Trust in the Process: Own what’s yours to control and trust God’s plan in all circumstances. 

Today, take actionable steps to reflect on or identify your two truths and a dream. Write them down. What steps will you take to align them and move forward? What will you do today to be your best self tomorrow? Let’s journey together to become our B.E.S.T. selves always remembering to: 

“Never let it rest until your good is better, and your better is BEST.”

~Dawn